










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 666 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 267 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2478 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2868 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2743 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2125 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,244,653 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 278 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | juodokas | 53% | 72 |
| #4 | 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭𝓲𝓮⚡ | 51% | 121 |
| #5 | GLOOK | 50% | 121 |
| #6 | valuee | 46% | 74 |
| #7 | dog | 42% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭𝓲𝓮⚡ | 12 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | dog | 9 | 0.0101 |
| #3 | GLOOK | 8 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | valuee | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | juodokas | 3 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GLOOK | 410 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | valuee | 400 | 0.26 | 11 min |
| #3 | 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭𝓲𝓮⚡ | 238 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | juodokas | 200 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | dog | 167 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭𝓲𝓮⚡ | +4.54 | 83 | 56 |
| #2 | dog | +2.24 | 85 | 62 |
| #3 | juodokas | +1.65 | 85 | 64 |
| #4 | GLOOK | +0.29 | 79 | 71 |
| #5 | cock'letas | -0.33 | 72 | 54 |





