








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 86 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 351 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3946 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3501 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4925 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3910 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3329 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,066,500 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crunchy sock | 57% | 40 |
| #2 | G3T | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | SpankHub | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | B3AR | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | M0t00000 | 50% | 226 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | M0t00000 | 50% | 226 |
| #6 | FilmTweaks | 48% | 107 |
| #7 | Maxy | 48% | 183 |
| #8 | KH0 | 47% | 154 |
| #9 | Gibbon Enjoyer | 43% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M0t00000 | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | crunchy sock | 10 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | SpankHub | 8 | 0.0112 |
| #4 | KH0 | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | FilmTweaks | 7 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maxy | 667 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #2 | M0t00000 | 456 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #3 | KH0 | 283 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | Gibbon Enjoyer | 205 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | FilmTweaks | 145 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Richard Dixon II | +2.35 | 67 | 66 |
| #2 | G3T | +1.73 | 73 | 41 |
| #3 | M0t00000 | +0.70 | 71 | 57 |
| #4 | crunchy sock | +0.13 | 57 | 48 |
| #5 | Maxy | -0.47 | 61 | 59 |





