








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 511 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4521 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,449 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2985 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2548 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3249 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3667 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,452 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | FTA bully | 47% | 57 |
| #10 | korzonEQ | 42% | 38 |
| #11 | ℤ𝕚𝕆𝕞 | 41% | 34 |
| #12 | PaiZ | 38% | 45 |
| #13 | VAC-OSA | 32% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fearless | 13 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Cezary Cezary | 7 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | Jezus | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Ta;pczan | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | FTA bully | 6 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fearless | 669 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #2 | иєχ[т] | 477 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #3 | Ta;pczan | 255 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | FTA bully | 212 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | Cezary Cezary | 204 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fearless | +2.41 | 90 | 64 |
| #2 | +w | +2.33 | 94 | 68 |
| #3 | positive | +2.00 | 87 | 59 |
| #4 | иєχ[т] | +0.42 | 80 | 56 |
| #5 | Cezary Cezary | +0.20 | 51 | 67 |





