








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 148 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 436 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 331 | 76% |
| Smokes | 85 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 10 | 2% |
| Molotovs | 10 | 2% |
Our logs show you have wasted $51,258 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | epikurczak1 | 44% | 41 |
| #5 | Larm | 11% | 9 |
| #6 | Piklan | 11% | 9 |
| #7 | geodetagłowanieta | 0% | 3 |
| #8 | goracydelfin | 0% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kubuebeinho | 7 | 0.0249 |
| #2 | 8aw1k | 5 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | epikurczak1 | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | goracydelfin | 1 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | geodetagłowanieta | 1 | 0.0204 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kubuebeinho | 78 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #2 | epikurczak1 | 33 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #3 | Larm | 33 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | Piklan | 27 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | 8aw1k | 18 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Larm | +3.79 | 74 | 68 |
| #2 | Kubuebeinho | +2.48 | 49 | 63 |
| #3 | epikurczak1 | +2.14 | 32 | 30 |
| #4 | 8aw1k | +1.69 | 54 | 25 |
| #5 | Piklan | +0.04 | 39 | 54 |





