








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1341 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 968 | 27% |
| Smokes | 781 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1003 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 807 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $459,939 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAPO KAPO | 6 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | J_CoLL | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | el negro blanco | 2 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Tupac | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Jerik | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J_CoLL | 215 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | KAPO KAPO | 69 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Jerik | 57 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #4 | mr finland | 54 | 0.28 | 1 min |
| #5 | Heribert Illig | 28 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAPO KAPO | +3.60 | 78 | 41 |
| #2 | marlon | +2.15 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | el negro blanco | +1.42 | 85 | 51 |
| #4 | J_CoLL | +0.76 | 63 | 62 |
| #5 | Jerik | -0.01 | 65 | 66 |





