








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 861 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 271 matches | ||
| Premier | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2729 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,437 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3379 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2565 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2523 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 970 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $841,516 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 231 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sarah | 57% | 21 |
| #2 | Mr. Clean | 55% | 60 |
| #3 | yummy sushi | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | ❤Asiancupcakee | 52% | 214 |
| #5 | eerf | 49% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eerf | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | catboy erwyn | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | ❤Asiancupcakee | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #4 | Mr. Clean | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eerf | 286 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | ❤Asiancupcakee | 202 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | Mr. Clean | 102 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | yummy sushi | 54 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | catboy erwyn | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sarah | +2.89 | 50 | 43 |
| #2 | ❤Asiancupcakee | +1.18 | 57 | 58 |
| #3 | yummy sushi | +0.51 | 43 | 57 |
| #4 | eerf | +0.32 | 45 | 65 |
| #5 | Mr. Clean | +0.28 | 41 | 52 |





