








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 645 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4464 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,527 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5642 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4543 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4573 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3769 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $977,609 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Gargolon | 67% | 42 |
| #2 | Bheris | 54% | 203 |
| #3 | prettypunaniamanda | 54% | 41 |
| #4 | DragonRider 734 | 53% | 130 |
| #5 | Shmitty | 52% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | DragonRider 734 | 53% | 130 |
| #5 | Shmitty | 52% | 23 |
| #6 | Phrog | 51% | 57 |
| #7 | j4hq | 51% | 63 |
| #8 | Roller | 50% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bheris | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | j4hq | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Phrog | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | prettypunaniamanda | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | DragonRider 734 | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DragonRider 734 | 459 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | Bheris | 238 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | j4hq | 200 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | ✪ Gargolon | 186 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | Roller | 89 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shmitty | +4.19 | 74 | 81 |
| #2 | Bheris | +1.86 | 70 | 54 |
| #3 | seaf | +1.70 | 65 | 73 |
| #4 | j4hq | +1.68 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | ✪ Gargolon | +0.86 | 66 | 58 |





