








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Esplay | 12 matches | 2,201 | |
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
943 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,218 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 588 | 27% |
| Smokes | 728 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 351 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 551 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $268,284 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #21 | Bergman | 50% | 4 |
| #22 | magi | 50% | 4 |
| #23 | Shibi | 50% | 4 |
| #24 | HS? | 44% | 9 |
| #25 | opti | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zerninator | 72 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Gibsand | 62 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | GAME | 43 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jacke | 41 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | dDaniii | 39 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luntyy | +4.38 | 93 | 64 |
| #2 | dDaniii | +3.97 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | GAME | +3.71 | 90 | 79 |
| #4 | Jabban | +3.33 | 79 | 54 |
| #5 | Lorm3N | +2.37 | 88 | 59 |





