








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1117 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 356 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6764 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,219 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3944 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1735 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 4085 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3455 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,117,795 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JibbitJayson | 71 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Mr.NoSkill | 29 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Karl Gustav | 27 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | iCraZzy | 25 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Dyhmie | 22 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.NoSkill | 657 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | Per1x | 465 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | JibbitJayson | 450 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #4 | Dyhmie | 444 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #5 | Zernichter | 410 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pencil_Case | +2.11 | 64 | 62 |
| #2 | Per1x | +1.09 | 58 | 76 |
| #3 | Zernichter | +0.56 | 70 | 62 |
| #4 | Mr.NoSkill | +0.51 | 55 | 66 |
| #5 | JibbitJayson | +0.36 | 78 | 62 |





