








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1617 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 811 matches | ||
| Esplay | 245 matches | 2,106 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8910 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,925 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7919 | 20% |
| Smokes | 12064 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 11746 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 8196 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,683,769 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 615 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ksksksksksk | 60% | 86 |
| #2 | Lear | 57% | 317 |
| #3 | p0wer | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | muzzow | 50% | 94 |
| #5 | melvin | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ksksksksksk | 60% | 86 |
| #2 | Lear | 57% | 317 |
| #3 | p0wer | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | muzzow | 50% | 94 |
| #5 | melvin | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lear | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | p0wer | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | muzzow | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lear | 783 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #2 | muzzow | 332 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | melvin | 182 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | ksksksksksk | 129 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | p0wer | 24 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ksksksksksk | +2.98 | 79 | 45 |
| #2 | muzzow | +2.59 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | Lear | +0.86 | 86 | 60 |
| #4 | melvin | -0.01 | 77 | 60 |
| #5 | para | -0.22 | 73 | 64 |





