








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 178 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 430 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4858 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,976 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1372 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1956 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1664 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1984 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $993,245 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 174 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ariashark | 53% | 43 |
| #2 | Mako🦈 | 48% | 54 |
| #3 | Brie | 46% | 215 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ariashark | 53% | 43 |
| #2 | Mako🦈 | 48% | 54 |
| #3 | Brie | 46% | 215 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brie | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | ariashark | 8 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | Mako🦈 | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brie | 341 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | Mako🦈 | 201 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | ariashark | 187 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mako🦈 | +3.76 | 63 | 58 |
| #2 | Ashley | +1.42 | 51 | 32 |
| #3 | ariashark | +1.31 | 80 | 73 |
| #4 | Brie | -2.00 | 18 | 48 |





