








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 466 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2362 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2440 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1559 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1072 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $675,554 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 242 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mak3 | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | Dille- | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | Zhube | 50% | 28 |
| #4 | HELL | 49% | 154 |
| #5 | Kurmis | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Kurmis | 47% | 38 |
| #6 | Reyston | 47% | 34 |
| #7 | Dreik | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | adrx wtw | 45% | 11 |
| #9 | MaHock | 33% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kurmis | 6 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Reyston | 5 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | Zhube | 4 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | Dille- | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | adrx wtw | 3 | 0.0143 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HELL | 161 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #2 | Kurmis | 139 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | MaHock | 131 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | Zhube | 66 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mak3 | 60 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | adrx wtw | +4.04 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | Dreik | +2.95 | 83 | 65 |
| #3 | Zhube | +2.79 | 94 | 59 |
| #4 | Dille- | +1.27 | 71 | 43 |
| #5 | Reyston | +1.25 | 88 | 56 |





