










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
363 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 463 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 113 | 24% |
| Smokes | 141 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 97 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 112 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $69,783 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HSR_P1sk1_Rac1ng | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | beesiten allu69 | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | JOKUMIES | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Paageri 69 | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | Miguel siittäjä | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Paageri 69 | 7 | 0.0378 |
| #2 | jari (RIP💔) | 5 | 0.0208 |
| #3 | JOKUMIES | 2 | 0.0061 |
| #4 | Miguel siittäjä | 1 | 0.0244 |
| #5 | 70cc-Derbi PEEK NOGGE | 1 | 0.0244 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKUMIES | 75 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #2 | Paageri 69 | 20 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | jari (RIP💔) | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | EINO ON PISKI | 3 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | beesiten allu69 | 2 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKUMIES | +5.29 | 92 | 54 |
| #2 | konetiskitabletti (downsyndrome) | +1.28 | 76 | 48 |
| #3 | Paageri 69 | +0.13 | 74 | 43 |
| #4 | HSR_P1sk1_Rac1ng | -0.38 | 64 | 7 |
| #5 | beesiten allu69 | -2.26 | 60 | 17 |





