










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 333 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 311 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,641 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4231 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3167 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3546 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2697 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,090,882 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 113 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloud NeiN! Pipes | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | wks | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | monty | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | ZayZay | 51% | 67 |
| #5 | ovec | 40% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloud NeiN! Pipes | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | wks | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | monty | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | ZayZay | 51% | 67 |
| #5 | ovec | 40% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZayZay | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | ovec | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | wks | 2 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | monty | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Cloud NeiN! Pipes | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZayZay | 315 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | ovec | 272 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | wks | 146 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #4 | Cloud NeiN! Pipes | 77 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | monty | 76 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wks | +4.80 | 82 | 68 |
| #2 | monty | +4.65 | 85 | 73 |
| #3 | ZayZay | +1.68 | 54 | 70 |
| #4 | Cloud NeiN! Pipes | +1.39 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | ovec | +0.24 | 74 | 64 |





