








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1260 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 249 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,699 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2312 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2407 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 682 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1298 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,628,776 of utility $241 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 658 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brokePC | 53% | 55 |
| #2 | JB | 52% | 244 |
| #3 | cosmic | 51% | 310 |
| #4 | ror | 39% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brokePC | 53% | 55 |
| #2 | JB | 52% | 244 |
| #3 | cosmic | 51% | 310 |
| #4 | ror | 39% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cosmic | 14 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | JB | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | ror | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | brokePC | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cosmic | 1288 | 0.19 | 31 min |
| #2 | JB | 645 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #3 | brokePC | 266 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #4 | ror | 29 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cosmic | +2.74 | 81 | 59 |
| #2 | brokePC | +1.39 | 74 | 48 |
| #3 | zeller | -0.29 | 64 | 46 |
| #4 | JB | -1.35 | 37 | 62 |
| #5 | ror | -5.41 | 19 | 16 |





