








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
473 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,461 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 368 | 25% |
| Smokes | 435 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 378 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 280 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $173,823 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dreadâ„¢ | 57% | 21 |
| #2 | BORN 2010 | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | Unexit | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | Tuborg Classic | 42% | 19 |
| #5 | Hader jeR | 42% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Tuborg Classic | 42% | 19 |
| #5 | Hader jeR | 42% | 19 |
| #6 | Gullemissen | 41% | 46 |
| #7 | LasseJuul89 | 39% | 49 |
| #8 | MikkelRHald | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MikkelRHald | 13 | 0.0241 |
| #2 | LasseJuul89 | 9 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | dreadâ„¢ | 9 | 0.0207 |
| #4 | Gullemissen | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Tuborg Classic | 4 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gullemissen | 128 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | BORN 2010 | 92 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| #3 | LasseJuul89 | 77 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Unexit | 70 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | MikkelRHald | 66 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Unexit | +4.97 | 91 | 70 |
| #2 | BORN 2010 | +4.47 | 87 | 75 |
| #3 | MikkelRHald | +1.10 | 82 | 47 |
| #4 | dreadâ„¢ | +0.97 | 67 | 38 |
| #5 | Gullemissen | +0.46 | 77 | 48 |





