








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
999 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,398 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 882 | 37% |
| Smokes | 810 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 285 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 421 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $130,746 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Otta Azsnee | 54% | 24 |
| #3 | Kappa | 50% | 46 |
| #4 | Kūjō Jorīn | 42% | 24 |
| #5 | 🤠 Meat KO | 40% | 10 |
| #6 | The Main 4ubillion | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kūjō Jorīn | 6 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | Kappa | 5 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappa | 178 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | The Main 4ubillion | 81 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | 🤠 Meat KO | 29 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #4 | Otta Azsnee | 18 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Kūjō Jorīn | 12 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | streak | +3.27 | 76 | 59 |
| #2 | Kappa | +3.07 | 86 | 62 |
| #3 | The Main 4ubillion | +0.12 | 83 | 56 |
| #4 | Otta Azsnee | -1.19 | 37 | 26 |
| #5 | Kūjō Jorīn | -2.53 | 12 | 22 |





