








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 348 matches | ||
| Faceit | 295 matches | ||
| Wingman | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11430 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,083 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6691 | 19% |
| Smokes | 11199 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 9086 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 8107 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,334,015 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1725 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 未来はだめです | 60% | 170 |
| #2 | Gæmer | 56% | 101 |
| #3 | NafisM | 54% | 254 |
| #4 | Chippy | 54% | 70 |
| #5 | CaraX | 51% | 144 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 未来はだめです | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | NafisM | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Gæmer | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | CaraX | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Chippy | 3 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NafisM | 573 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #2 | Gæmer | 205 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Chippy | 179 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | CaraX | 147 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | 未来はだめです | 119 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seth | +2.10 | 71 | 63 |
| #2 | Gæmer | +0.27 | 46 | 43 |
| #3 | NafisM | +0.20 | 85 | 62 |
| #4 | Chippy | -0.22 | 89 | 56 |
| #5 | CaraX | -0.59 | 74 | 53 |





