








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1633 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1316 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1673 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1322 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $144,810 of utility $50 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | APG CEO Oums | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | BIG RAPACE | 72% | 32 |
| #3 | LoTenTicK | 69% | 16 |
| #4 | qZzQ | 66% | 62 |
| #5 | ✟ Azrael ✟ | 65% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | LoTenTicK | 69% | 16 |
| #4 | qZzQ | 66% | 62 |
| #5 | ✟ Azrael ✟ | 65% | 20 |
| #6 | ム TheRuMi012 ム | 65% | 60 |
| #7 | BlackPanters | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ム TheRuMi012 ム | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | qZzQ | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | APG CEO Oums | 1 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ム TheRuMi012 ム | 176 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #2 | qZzQ | 104 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | LoTenTicK | 104 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #4 | BIG RAPACE | 42 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | APG CEO Oums | 21 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ム TheRuMi012 ム | +3.70 | 87 | 67 |
| #2 | qZzQ | +2.02 | 83 | 67 |
| #3 | sqNto[V]- | +1.91 | 73 | 74 |
| #4 | LoTenTicK | -0.49 | 80 | 74 |
| #5 | ✟ Azrael ✟ | -1.43 | 63 | 61 |





