








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1100 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 494 matches | ||
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 185 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




139 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,898 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1117 | 16% |
| Smokes | 687 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 2886 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 2208 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,233,124 of utility $244 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2894 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrampuz | 50% | 265 |
| #2 | Deltaq20 | 44% | 519 |
| #3 | Antimatter | 40% | 57 |
| #4 | BL19 | 36% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrampuz | 50% | 265 |
| #2 | Deltaq20 | 44% | 519 |
| #3 | Antimatter | 40% | 57 |
| #4 | BL19 | 36% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deltaq20 | 193 | 0.0253 |
| #2 | Qrampuz | 34 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Antimatter | 34 | 0.0300 |
| #4 | BL19 | 21 | 0.0113 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrampuz | 822 | 0.16 | 22 min |
| #2 | Deltaq20 | 470 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | BL19 | 388 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #4 | Antimatter | 229 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrampuz | +3.24 | 71 | 69 |
| #2 | dumlaxjävel | +1.39 | 64 | 30 |
| #3 | Antimatter | -0.53 | 31 | 53 |
| #4 | BL19 | -1.83 | 31 | 56 |
| #5 | Deltaq20 | -2.14 | 21 | 18 |





