








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 63 matches | ||
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,779 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1445 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1168 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1661 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1505 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $201,979 of utility $35 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LarryS | 70 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | DEMON⭕⃤ | 57 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | robzel | 38 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | Max Verstappen | 35 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | rusty | 19 | 0.05 | 0 min |





