








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 409 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 253 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2682 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,720 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2192 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2541 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2171 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1816 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,047,494 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Admiral Achmed | 73% | 59 |
| #2 | Horan DEAG | Bloodycase.com | 71% | 24 |
| #3 | nikko_ks | 68% | 158 |
| #4 | Pound Hound | 66% | 177 |
| #5 | ☭Karma☭ | 64% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Horan DEAG | Bloodycase.com | 71% | 24 |
| #3 | nikko_ks | 68% | 158 |
| #4 | Pound Hound | 66% | 177 |
| #5 | ☭Karma☭ | 64% | 50 |
| #6 | EL1JAH | 62% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EL1JAH | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | ☭Karma☭ | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pound Hound | 427 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | nikko_ks | 190 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | EL1JAH | 111 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Horan DEAG | Bloodycase.com | 77 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | Admiral Achmed | 68 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Illum <3 | +2.24 | 60 | 64 |
| #2 | Horan DEAG | Bloodycase.com | +1.81 | 73 | 63 |
| #3 | Pound Hound | +0.78 | 64 | 63 |
| #4 | Admiral Achmed | +0.40 | 66 | 52 |
| #5 | EL1JAH | +0.07 | 43 | 55 |





