










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,142 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 352 | 16% |
| Smokes | 449 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 737 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 604 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $252,011 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 122 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LergVon | 50% | 52 |
| #2 | Ov3rR1deR | 43% | 7 |
| #3 | D3v1l_E4g1e | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | ♥ Emzziie ♥ | 38% | 21 |
| #5 | NexusX1 | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | D3v1l_E4g1e | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | ♥ Emzziie ♥ | 38% | 21 |
| #5 | NexusX1 | 36% | 25 |
| #6 | NeonValor | 33% | 30 |
| #7 | SLeXiMisT | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Emzziie ♥ | 4 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | NeonValor | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | NexusX1 | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Emzziie ♥ | 87 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | LergVon | 60 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | NeonValor | 39 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | D3v1l_E4g1e | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | SLeXiMisT | 21 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ov3rR1deR | +7.01 | 58 | 54 |
| #2 | SLeXiMisT | +3.84 | 56 | 57 |
| #3 | LergVon | +3.73 | 88 | 54 |
| #4 | NeonValor | +2.15 | 89 | 52 |
| #5 | ♥ Emzziie ♥ | +0.31 | 51 | 67 |





