








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2300 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,121 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2609 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3234 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2317 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1961 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $788,739 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plat | 14 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | matosas | 9 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Blank | 8 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | juv | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK | 5 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plat | 568 | 0.27 | 17 min |
| #2 | matosas | 470 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #3 | KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK | 332 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #4 | juv | 237 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | JOZUwms* | 182 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plat | +3.53 | 75 | 82 |
| #2 | juv | +2.18 | 82 | 67 |
| #3 | JOZUwms* | +2.00 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | UnknownGranny | +1.51 | 78 | 53 |
| #5 | eP1cK- | +0.99 | 66 | 63 |





