








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 354 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4233 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,743 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2277 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1218 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1452 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2796 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $651,957 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sizuya | 61% | 89 |
| #2 | exw paei mental ⛟ | 57% | 61 |
| #3 | ^_^ | 53% | 204 |
| #4 | FamilyFriendly- ⛟ | 51% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sizuya | 61% | 89 |
| #2 | exw paei mental ⛟ | 57% | 61 |
| #3 | ^_^ | 53% | 204 |
| #4 | FamilyFriendly- ⛟ | 51% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^_^ | 22 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | exw paei mental ⛟ | 20 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | FamilyFriendly- ⛟ | 15 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | sizuya | 9 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^_^ | 1318 | 0.31 | 33 min |
| #2 | FamilyFriendly- ⛟ | 750 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #3 | sizuya | 109 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | exw paei mental ⛟ | 97 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sizuya | +3.04 | 74 | 59 |
| #2 | FamilyFriendly- ⛟ | +2.35 | 93 | 59 |
| #3 | ^_^ | +1.98 | 74 | 63 |
| #4 | h1xx_ ⛟ | +0.69 | 73 | 54 |
| #5 | exw paei mental ⛟ | -5.92 | 9 | 42 |





