








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 179 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 271 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2619 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,958 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1753 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3899 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2856 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2450 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,325,310 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tumbleR | 52% | 75 |
| #2 | DANNY | 50% | 186 |
| #3 | onarres1g | 45% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tumbleR | 52% | 75 |
| #2 | DANNY | 50% | 186 |
| #3 | onarres1g | 45% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANNY | 21 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | onarres1g | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | tumbleR | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANNY | 1025 | 0.26 | 32 min |
| #2 | onarres1g | 680 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #3 | tumbleR | 305 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANNY | +2.21 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | tumbleR | +1.84 | 90 | 61 |
| #3 | onarres1g | -0.39 | 92 | 78 |
| #4 | Em3o5 | -0.94 | 56 | 61 |





