








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 438 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4396 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,668 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2226 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2267 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4464 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 2711 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,022,029 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cow Cow Moo | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | 동성애혐오적인 여성 | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | LegendGamer55 | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Here 4 the kek | 49% | 293 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cow Cow Moo | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | 동성애혐오적인 여성 | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | LegendGamer55 | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | Here 4 the kek | 49% | 293 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Here 4 the kek | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | 동성애혐오적인 여성 | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | LegendGamer55 | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Here 4 the kek | 734 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | Cow Cow Moo | 76 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | LegendGamer55 | 48 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | 동성애혐오적인 여성 | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 동성애혐오적인 여성 | +1.65 | 82 | 40 |
| #2 | Cow Cow Moo | +1.61 | 75 | 31 |
| #3 | Here 4 the kek | +0.73 | 75 | 39 |
| #4 | LegendGamer55 | +0.42 | 69 | 45 |
| #5 | Dee ♥ sqbest | +0.38 | 57 | 49 |





