








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 266 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1795 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,046 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1872 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1984 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1502 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1688 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $356,262 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 185 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xajN_ | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | MAGiCACHMED´ | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Vik53 | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | any | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | BurningTrashcan | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | BurningTrashcan | 47% | 15 |
| #6 | SaN | 46% | 37 |
| #7 | $EYED | 43% | 28 |
| #8 | mugiwara rolan; | 42% | 33 |
| #9 | symon | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | any | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | mugiwara rolan; | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | MAGiCACHMED´ | 1 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $EYED | 134 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | SaN | 103 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | any | 96 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | mugiwara rolan; | 58 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Vik53 | 53 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mugiwara rolan; | +1.44 | 87 | 51 |
| #2 | any | +1.36 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | i love cs 🚬 | +0.80 | 86 | 70 |
| #4 | MAGiCACHMED´ | +0.78 | 92 | 61 |
| #5 | $EYED | +0.12 | 69 | 71 |





