








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 335 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 368 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3343 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,646 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2901 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1182 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 4920 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 1643 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,156,642 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ButterCow | 46% | 78 |
| #2 | scavvvInPaJaMaS- | 45% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ButterCow | 46% | 78 |
| #2 | scavvvInPaJaMaS- | 45% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ButterCow | 44 | 0.0268 |
| #2 | scavvvInPaJaMaS- | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ButterCow | 121 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | scavvvInPaJaMaS- | 28 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jebbers just better | +0.15 | 72 | 53 |
| #2 | scavvvInPaJaMaS- | -0.01 | 64 | 52 |
| #3 | ButterCow | -2.04 | 39 | 40 |





