








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 921 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 141 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5572 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4617 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3885 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1779 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3933 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,217,738 of utility $227 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 539 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Gl1tch | 50% | 103 |
| #8 | Elmer | 49% | 85 |
| #9 | Assbear | 48% | 316 |
| #10 | ggpiff | 3smoke | 47% | 47 |
| #11 | Simpl1 the best | 47% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LapskausLars© | +3.06 | 70 | 70 |
| #2 | Elmer | +2.30 | 64 | 57 |
| #3 | Simpl1 the best | +1.91 | 69 | 69 |
| #4 | ggpiff | 3smoke | +1.54 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | Assbear | +1.39 | 48 | 56 |





