








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 36 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
776 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,928 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 812 | 28% |
| Smokes | 881 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 683 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 552 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $267,321 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aakra | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | juan | 50% | 4 |
| #3 | wintergod | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | ostebrod | 47% | 74 |
| #5 | Snooben | 47% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ostebrod | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Snooben | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ostebrod | +3.70 | 69 | 82 |
| #2 | juan | +3.55 | 95 | 45 |
| #3 | wintergod | +0.61 | 82 | 62 |
| #4 | dyb | +0.52 | 72 | 53 |
| #5 | chike | -0.60 | 67 | 70 |





