








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1577 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4344 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,643 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3377 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3902 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3519 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2845 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,826,592 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 384 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ion | 64% | 59 |
| #2 | Frick | 64% | 33 |
| #3 | ☪ Rocket2235 | 63% | 84 |
| #4 | thebluegoatsings | 61% | 120 |
| #5 | Chocolate Thunder | 60% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | thebluegoatsings | 61% | 120 |
| #5 | Chocolate Thunder | 60% | 45 |
| #6 | Zaidi | 55% | 83 |
| #7 | Ziomo4D | 55% | 22 |
| #8 | Milf Lover69 | 53% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ion | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | ☪ Rocket2235 | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Frick | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Milf Lover69 | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | thebluegoatsings | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milf Lover69 | 526 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | thebluegoatsings | 255 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Zaidi | 225 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | ion | 107 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Frick | 90 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thebluegoatsings | +6.33 | 91 | 55 |
| #2 | PzAvocado | +2.30 | 76 | 66 |
| #3 | ☪ Rocket2235 | +1.84 | 60 | 45 |
| #4 | ion | +1.15 | 76 | 57 |
| #5 | Frick | +1.04 | 71 | 58 |





