








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 404 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,084 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2826 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4932 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4595 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4731 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,335,826 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1324 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | vilgoda | 46% | 117 |
| #9 | 𝐋𝐮𝐤𝟑 | 45% | 38 |
| #10 | Snoms | 44% | 132 |
| #11 | Woobie Woobie | 39% | 194 |
| #12 | Dill Dough | 32% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Woobie Woobie | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Just PooPoo | 7 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | Snoms | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Dill Dough | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Tomas-b-m | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tomas-b-m | 483 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | grog | 383 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | 𝐋𝐮𝐤𝟑 | 263 | 0.32 | 7 min |
| #4 | Woobie Woobie | 253 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #5 | vilgoda | 159 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t✿mps | +3.61 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | Freyja | +1.79 | 76 | 51 |
| #3 | Just PooPoo | +1.61 | 67 | 55 |
| #4 | ahh shi bal | +1.54 | 64 | 64 |
| #5 | AMD | +0.14 | 42 | 69 |





