








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,975 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 751 | 25% |
| Smokes | 498 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 914 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 812 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,046 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | My Toe Tuo Pi | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | Counttis | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | emukki | 56% | 36 |
| #4 | voluk | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | Skynet.tns | 50% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Kimple | 46% | 50 |
| #7 | ":)" | 33% | 9 |
| #8 | TötVerme | 33% | 21 |
| #9 | Jermu | 32% | 22 |
| #10 | Pyyli | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voluk | 5 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Kimple | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | emukki | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | TötVerme | 2 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Skynet.tns | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voluk | 126 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #2 | Counttis | 119 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | emukki | 87 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | TötVerme | 82 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Skynet.tns | 66 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voluk | +11.19 | 95 | 73 |
| #2 | TötVerme | +2.38 | 26 | 45 |
| #3 | Counttis | +0.32 | 44 | 51 |
| #4 | Skynet.tns | -0.12 | 57 | 53 |
| #5 | My Toe Tuo Pi | -1.22 | 52 | 27 |





