










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 730 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1577 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2840 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1619 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1265 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2150 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $924,954 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GrizzlyMex72 | 51% | 94 |
| #2 | Halvz | 43% | 53 |
| #3 | Hex | 41% | 27 |
| #4 | xTheSavageJuanx | 37% | 70 |
| #5 | 1234 | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Halvz | 43% | 53 |
| #3 | Hex | 41% | 27 |
| #4 | xTheSavageJuanx | 37% | 70 |
| #5 | 1234 | 35% | 17 |
| #6 | Nikotine | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nikotine | 5 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | GrizzlyMex72 | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Halvz | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | xTheSavageJuanx | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GrizzlyMex72 | 336 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | Hex | 81 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | xTheSavageJuanx | 74 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | 1234 | 61 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Nikotine | 58 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hex | +2.34 | 69 | 63 |
| #2 | 1234 | +2.30 | 73 | 71 |
| #3 | Halvz | +1.06 | 60 | 30 |
| #4 | Nikotine | -0.20 | 58 | 53 |
| #5 | DarkMage | -0.72 | 40 | 50 |





