








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 191 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
471 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,882 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 855 | 45% |
| Smokes | 319 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 433 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 275 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $129,479 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | guiaxtBR | 60% | 10 |
| #9 | muri | 58% | 26 |
| #10 | CurTs | 57% | 7 |
| #11 | Wigglezera | 55% | 20 |
| #12 | BeNekX | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muri | 15 | 0.0273 |
| #2 | Wigglezera | 12 | 0.0297 |
| #3 | chupisco | 12 | 0.0400 |
| #4 | BeNekX | 9 | 0.0303 |
| #5 | CurTs | 2 | 0.0154 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muri | 148 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #2 | chupisco | 90 | 0.30 | 2 min |
| #3 | Wigglezera | 71 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | BeNekX | 68 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | guiaxtBR | 53 | 0.26 | 1 min |





