








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2171 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 98 matches | ||
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 48 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 94 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,145 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5205 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4064 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 12772 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 7104 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,361,915 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 605 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eierkocher Geissini | 57% | 65 |
| #2 | Overlord Zenon | 54% | 213 |
| #3 | < blank > | 53% | 51 |
| #4 | Feierbörd ツ | 50% | 422 |
| #5 | Juuuko | 49% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juuuko | +3.67 | 70 | 43 |
| #2 | Eierkocher Geissini | +3.64 | 78 | 51 |
| #3 | < blank > | +3.57 | 67 | 55 |
| #4 | Willem ツ | +2.68 | 68 | 59 |
| #5 | Shiroxツ | +1.23 | 63 | 64 |





