








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 551 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 400 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3332 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,637 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 116 | 1% |
| Smokes | 3209 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3370 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1942 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,932,737 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | +W Antagonist | 66% | 41 |
| #2 | Ken-oH | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | Yatsuu | 47% | 45 |
| #4 | SiN♡ | 45% | 33 |
| #5 | Kann`aïe | 43% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ken-oH | 6 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | LW | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Kann`aïe | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Yatsuu | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | SiN♡ | 3 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ken-oH | 146 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | +W Antagonist | 88 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | LW | 79 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | SiN♡ | 75 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | ❟❛❟ WonkS ♥ ❟❛❟ | 68 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❟❛❟ WonkS ♥ ❟❛❟ | +4.01 | 84 | 49 |
| #2 | +W Antagonist | +3.34 | 85 | 58 |
| #3 | Yatsuu | +3.26 | 83 | 33 |
| #4 | SiN♡ | +2.90 | 85 | 59 |
| #5 | Ken-oH | +1.80 | 79 | 72 |





