








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 484 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4478 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,481 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 504 | 11% |
| Smokes | 282 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 2548 | 57% |
| Molotovs | 1147 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $85,430 of utility $7 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 74 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fidus | 53% | 49 |
| #2 | Tai-Ming | 52% | 58 |
| #3 | Kai-Ting | 50% | 218 |
| #4 | Villy "Helm-Hamo-Head" Georgo | 47% | 252 |
| #5 | Ryan | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Tai-Ming | 52% | 58 |
| #3 | Kai-Ting | 50% | 218 |
| #4 | Villy "Helm-Hamo-Head" Georgo | 47% | 252 |
| #5 | Ryan | 42% | 33 |
| #6 | Garlic ******* Hotline | 37% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Villy "Helm-Hamo-Head" Georgo | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Fidus | 6 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Ryan | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Kai-Ting | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Garlic ******* Hotline | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai-Ting | 1013 | 0.22 | 28 min |
| #2 | Villy "Helm-Hamo-Head" Georgo | 267 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #3 | Garlic ******* Hotline | 158 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | Fidus | 156 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | Tai-Ming | 88 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai-Ting | +1.71 | 53 | 76 |
| #2 | Ryan | +1.58 | 39 | 42 |
| #3 | Tai-Ming | +0.16 | 62 | 52 |
| #4 | Villy "Helm-Hamo-Head" Georgo | +0.06 | 42 | 47 |
| #5 | Knai-Fing | +0.05 | 52 | 24 |





