








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,417 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 187 | 13% |
| Smokes | 535 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 491 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 204 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $327,477 of utility $235 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JP | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Lux | 79% | 19 |
| #3 | Mange | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | MGK | 75% | 4 |
| #5 | Sjorven | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boberrrrr | 8 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | MGK | 1 | 0.0141 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boberrrrr | 102 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | Kürt Kobani | 42 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Sjorven | 38 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | MGK | 22 | 0.31 | 0 min |
| #5 | Lux | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mange | +7.57 | 85 | 53 |
| #2 | Lux | +3.71 | 50 | 50 |
| #3 | Sjorven | +3.14 | 44 | 67 |
| #4 | areakosekanshyperbolicus | +2.56 | 73 | 48 |
| #5 | Kürt Kobani | -0.47 | 69 | 59 |





