








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 631 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 64 matches | ||
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4000 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,195 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2565 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2430 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2004 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1196 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,246,594 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 409 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaetee | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | Eddy | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | GRANITEMAUL | 57% | 54 |
| #4 | lolsifer | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | Muk | 54% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BarrytheRobot | 307 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | GRANITEMAUL | 301 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #3 | the big slime 2 | 115 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Muk | 80 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | lolsifer | 78 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaetee | +3.53 | 81 | 45 |
| #2 | Gregory Feather-Stone | +2.92 | 79 | 58 |
| #3 | hughbot | +1.94 | 81 | 56 |
| #4 | the big slime 2 | +1.72 | 76 | 60 |
| #5 | Eddy | +0.36 | 93 | 43 |





