








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 551 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,009 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4162 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3675 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2324 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2848 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $599,166 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 995 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peregrinus | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | Norwegians | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | stattik | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | red bull guzzler | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | realiZe | 50% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | realiZe | 293 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | vortex | 183 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | red bull guzzler | 115 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | stattik | 88 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kogi | 71 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stattik | +3.39 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | vortex | +2.19 | 71 | 65 |
| #3 | GoShadow | +2.02 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | red bull guzzler | +1.68 | 85 | 55 |
| #5 | Norwegians | +0.52 | 82 | 60 |





