








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 157 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,770 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 384 | 22% |
| Smokes | 450 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 556 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 380 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $427,372 of utility $282 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 241 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forslund | 43% | 35 |
| #2 | Robby | 42% | 59 |
| #3 | Katten | 41% | 56 |
| #4 | Ewenman | 35% | 26 |
| #5 | KasseLasse | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Forslund | 43% | 35 |
| #2 | Robby | 42% | 59 |
| #3 | Katten | 41% | 56 |
| #4 | Ewenman | 35% | 26 |
| #5 | KasseLasse | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robby | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Katten | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Ewenman | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Robby | 263 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #2 | Katten | 103 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Forslund | 59 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ewenman | 41 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | KasseLasse | 13 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Katten | +0.43 | 62 | 55 |
| #2 | Robby | +0.33 | 65 | 69 |
| #3 | Forslund | -0.48 | 61 | 65 |
| #4 | ︻デ 一✪ Boyoyoyoying-cat | -0.88 | 58 | 56 |
| #5 | KasseLasse | -4.29 | 50 | 47 |





