








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 72 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
201 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 654 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 69 | 11% |
| Smokes | 150 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 243 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 192 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $157,913 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brazz | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | Bounty | 41% | 17 |
| #3 | HnC | 41% | 32 |
| #4 | ★KladySs★ | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Gooey McLooey | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ★KladySs★ | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | Gooey McLooey | 39% | 28 |
| #6 | _LeNzU$_ | 38% | 8 |
| #7 | Cann0nball | 33% | 3 |
| #8 | KrelleB | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HnC | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | KrelleB | 1 | 0.0169 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HnC | 103 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | ★KladySs★ | 52 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | Bounty | 47 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | _LeNzU$_ | 36 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #5 | Gooey McLooey | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bounty | +2.91 | 63 | 69 |
| #2 | Brazz | +1.56 | 51 | 83 |
| #3 | _LeNzU$_ | +1.52 | 66 | 60 |
| #4 | HnC | +1.34 | 58 | 81 |
| #5 | Gooey McLooey | -0.40 | 57 | 51 |





