








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 733 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2997 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,054 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3883 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2361 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1287 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3523 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,184,326 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 567 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fredrick™ | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | 喜び | 61% | 56 |
| #3 | Oda Noboostnaga | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Sbeve | 49% | 207 |
| #5 | Swaey | 46% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swaey | 697 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #2 | Sbeve | 605 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #3 | awppa | 229 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Oda Noboostnaga | 134 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #5 | 喜び | 104 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sbeve | +3.16 | 85 | 62 |
| #2 | Fredrick™ | +2.85 | 67 | 46 |
| #3 | 喜び | +2.02 | 87 | 53 |
| #4 | Swaey | +1.51 | 80 | 68 |
| #5 | Dir7y | +1.06 | 75 | 60 |





