








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 107 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1686 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,807 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2885 | 42% |
| Smokes | 1781 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 669 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1472 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $256,914 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tucker | 87% | 23 |
| #2 | figment | 80% | 25 |
| #3 | chanel | 78% | 18 |
| #4 | reagan | 76% | 17 |
| #5 | HOOMY | 63% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tucker | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | reagan | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Reaper | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1Manny | 114 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Tucker | 105 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | HOOMY | 98 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | Spooky Jinneah | 95 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #5 | RMV1207 | 90 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | figment | +2.65 | 89 | 67 |
| #2 | reagan | +2.38 | 91 | 54 |
| #3 | Tucker | +1.96 | 82 | 79 |
| #4 | Spooky Jinneah | +1.41 | 93 | 65 |
| #5 | chanel | +1.31 | 80 | 45 |





