








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 560 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 472 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4195 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2102 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2975 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 1006 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 967 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $367,120 of utility $30 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1570 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CockJuicinCumDrizzler | 58% | 96 |
| #2 | MONXRCH | 57% | 65 |
| #3 | Aspen | 55% | 60 |
| #4 | steven | 50% | 120 |
| #5 | SoTasty | 43% | 215 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | steven | 248 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | MONXRCH | 239 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | CockJuicinCumDrizzler | 230 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | SoTasty | 220 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Aspen | 162 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AgentE0464 | +3.83 | 50 | 40 |
| #2 | CockJuicinCumDrizzler | +2.82 | 50 | 39 |
| #3 | SoTasty | +2.23 | 54 | 31 |
| #4 | steven | +1.17 | 29 | 54 |
| #5 | MONXRCH | +0.21 | 63 | 54 |





