








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 935 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1310 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8332 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,704 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13994 | 36% |
| Smokes | 14820 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2610 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 7280 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,589,908 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 359 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Little Michael Jackson | 52% | 83 |
| #2 | ♡⊹˚₊chips₊˚⊹♡ | 45% | 80 |
| #3 | MONXRCH | 45% | 136 |
| #4 | AgentE0464 | 38% | 122 |
| #5 | ⛟ ⛟ chillibean ⛟ ⛟ | 35% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Little Michael Jackson | 52% | 83 |
| #2 | ♡⊹˚₊chips₊˚⊹♡ | 45% | 80 |
| #3 | MONXRCH | 45% | 136 |
| #4 | AgentE0464 | 38% | 122 |
| #5 | ⛟ ⛟ chillibean ⛟ ⛟ | 35% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MONXRCH | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Little Michael Jackson | 9 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | ♡⊹˚₊chips₊˚⊹♡ | 9 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | AgentE0464 | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | ⛟ ⛟ chillibean ⛟ ⛟ | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AgentE0464 | 597 | 0.24 | 15 min |
| #2 | MONXRCH | 521 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #3 | Little Michael Jackson | 311 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | ⛟ ⛟ chillibean ⛟ ⛟ | 105 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | ♡⊹˚₊chips₊˚⊹♡ | 82 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AgentE0464 | +3.08 | 50 | 57 |
| #2 | Little Michael Jackson | +2.24 | 54 | 50 |
| #3 | ⛟ ⛟ chillibean ⛟ ⛟ | +1.16 | 49 | 44 |
| #4 | MONXRCH | +0.38 | 56 | 56 |
| #5 | ♡⊹˚₊chips₊˚⊹♡ | -1.41 | 45 | 25 |





