








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1328 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 107 matches | ||
| Premier | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3950 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3226 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2980 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2680 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2028 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,246,084 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1933 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | UrbanTurban :D | 51% | 151 |
| #9 | Neheppo | 48% | 27 |
| #10 | PomKz | 47% | 87 |
| #11 | KorvSara | 41% | 22 |
| #12 | TurboBosse | 37% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandy69 | 8 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | UrbanTurban :D | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Bell0Z | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Robin | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | PomKz | 4 | 0.0024 |





