








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 369 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Faceit | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2543 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,740 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2050 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2507 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2307 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1876 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $977,206 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JJ | 68% | 34 |
| #2 | Tronald Dump | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | Ni | 59% | 68 |
| #4 | ImpulsXE | 55% | 114 |
| #5 | IRUTAS | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ImpulsXE | 55% | 114 |
| #5 | IRUTAS | 55% | 20 |
| #6 | ✪Cori✪ | 52% | 69 |
| #7 | TTV GonzaHD | 47% | 36 |
| #8 | xFaJa | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImpulsXE | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | ✪Cori✪ | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Ni | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | TTV GonzaHD | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | xFaJa | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Cori✪ | 317 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | ImpulsXE | 253 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | Ni | 209 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | xFaJa | 90 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | JJ | 72 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ni | +1.87 | 72 | 65 |
| #2 | Dirty | +1.12 | 85 | 63 |
| #3 | IRUTAS | +0.60 | 59 | 63 |
| #4 | JJ | +0.31 | 67 | 63 |
| #5 | ImpulsXE | +0.22 | 67 | 70 |





